Strip Mall Church

You definitely haven't lived until you've been into a strip mall church.

My great aunt passed last week and there was a memorial service today for her. Her children live in California, Massachusetts and Rhode Island. Since she lived in RI, her RI son set up the service. He did not approach the congregation where my aunt had been a member of many years, instead he opted to have his golfing buddy host the memorial service. This golfing buddy is a pastor (?) in a strip mall church! I was convinced that we were entering a cult den by looks of the exterior of the building but was not worried as I am into wearing foil hats and writhing on the ground. Luckily I was mistaken. The interior was a modest room where family and friends sat comfortably. The pastor was a pleasant man and freely stated that he did not know my aunt and that he could not heal our pain and that the pain will never go away, just get better over time. I thought that was nice. While the attendants bowed their heads to pray, I came up with this list as my attention span in minimal in church.

The Pros of a Strip Mall Church:

1) Small congregation so more chance to socialize

2) The pastor was married so he won't lecture you on sex

3) You can walk next door to get a sandwich and lottery tickets

4) Service was over and done with in 30 minutes and the only people who spoke at length were family.

The Cons of a Strip Mall Church:

1) It's a little "shady"

2) Terrible paneling

3) C'mon...it's in a strip mall!!

4) No starchy wafers and cheap wine